I Knew The Exact Moment My Brain Had Been Fried to a Crisp

4:17 p.m. I'm driving along in the van with the kids.

Owen: Mom! Mommmmmmmmmmm!!!

Me: Yes Owen?

Owen: Alex pinched meeeee!

Alex: I did not Oh-Wen!

Owen, accentuating each individual word with a scream: YOU DID TOO!

Annika, in her best mom imitation: Alex, what did you do?

Alex: I do this.

Alex leans over and pinches Owen, causing Owen to start screaming again.

Annika: Alex! You need to apologize to Owen. (slight pause. Silence) Hey Owen, guess what?

She continues, now switching to a sing-song voice: Owen likes to shave llamas! Owen likes to shave llamas!

Owen: I do not Annika! I doooooo notttttttttttttttttttttttt!

Annika: Okay, then. Mommy likes to shave llamas! Mommy smells like llamas! (giggling) Mommy smells like horse poop!

Annika, catching my disapproving eye in the rear view mirror: I actually like the smell the horse poop. (nervous giggle, followed by same sing-song voice) Mommy smells like angel kisses...Mommy smells like angel kisses....